A lot of things make me think. This, I know, is very vague, but I will zoom right into the big picture of the night: Family. Yes, the big fam and all things relative. What is better than that in this world? I really cannot come to another other conclusions. The driving force to everyday life and inspiration usually comes from your family and I think it has earned its spotlight for tonight.
I don't even know where to begin. I grew up as an only child with a mom and a dad. Very blase. I had a dog and a fish and everything was normal (as normal as one family can get). My family got torn apart one day and everything seemed to crash so suddenly. What was I left with? A soaking pillow and doubts for change. I didn't need to doubt, but I was young then -- still trying to figure out the meaning of things that were around me. It is hard for anyone to understand why people tear apart to be rejoined with another who can potentionally tear from them to reattach to someone else. It just didn't make sense and it was scary. We all know that "fairy tale ending" where we women are struck forcefully in the heart with feelings to thus be taken away by our lover to live a happy life until the end of time. Romantic, but obviously unrealistic. Things are difficult to understand and they don't work out right most of the time. When one comes to this thought, then how are they supposed to see that love and families work out?
I have no need to get into relationships here and now, so I won't get into it. Humans do need to socialize to live efficiently, so relationships do matter (this is all I will say about it). No matter what, we all will find that person that keeps us going every morning even if they are your partner or just someone you truly care about. Things work when you find the right person that can help you see a little better. I mean, come on, how is it possible to think clearly when you are bogged up with your own problems? Call that plumber quick before you explode into utter sadness! Don't get this far, okay? Find that person that steers you in a different direction because, sometimes, you need a change.
My new direction takes me into my family. Although it is broken, I have found a plumber that has been able to tell me that my pipes were not damaged all along! I still have a family even though most of it is not even related to me. I have let in numerous people into my life because they love my family, so I will love them just the same. Bumps on this path have taken many tolls on me, but I have compensated. Over time, I have come to realize that everyone is family and that we are all just trying to socialize and live our lives. I cherish this most of all.
I was swept off of my feet by love. Remember, I am single, but, in my heart, I am taken: taken by my cousins, aunts and uncles, grandma, brother, sister, mom, dad, my dad's fiance's family, and my mom's boyfriend's family. Together, we have all created a fairy tale on our own. This story is the most realistic and I have come to enjoy it. My pillow isn't sopping wet anymore -- all of my doubts are gone. Things are changing everyday right in front of me. My problems will always be minor because I have my family in front of me, surrounding me with every step I take. I see how fast time goes by, but it doesn't feel like it is slipping away. I have all of the time in the world and with this time, I will spend it with my family.
If you can feel your heart beating, then you are alive. The risks, challenges, and changes do not work against you. For me, all of these have kept me strong enough to hold onto memories in the making. The biggest change is feeling stronger with your family. A simple "I love you" said first out of your own mouth can make the best impact; it can make those torn edges reattach with a firmer seam. This, right here, is what it is all about. This, right here, is something I can never doubt.
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